Put Don Young in de coconut, shake it all up...

Young tries to explain Coconut Road earmark

WASHINGTON - Rep. Don Young for the first time offered a public defense of a secretive transportation earmark that so angered fellow lawmakers that they called on the Justice Department to investigate it.

Speaking Wednesday on the floor of the House of Representatives, the Alaska Republican acknowledged that he'd "been the subject of much innuendo" for the 2005 earmark, which shifted $10 million from a road-widening project in southwest Florida to a study of an interstate interchange that promised to benefit one of Young's campaign donors.

Young said that the earmark, part of a $286.4 billion highway bill he oversaw as chairman of the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, was never intended to benefit anyone in particular. The accusations about his role in it have "little if any connection with what actually occurred," Young said in an 11-minute speech.

His remarks came just hours before the House voted 358-51 to join a Senate call for a Justice Department investigation into the earmark. The Senate historian's office said it could recall no example in modern times of the Senate ever asking the department to look into possible criminal conduct by a House member.

Now THERE is a SERIOUS SHOWING OF FAITH AND TRUST! I guess he doesn't represent them either since they voted against him!

Here is his speech - the drinking game word for the day is "road."



Then we turn to the Alaska Newsreader for the purely entertaining story that they got from the Fairbanks Daily News Miner about the boy-cat fight between Young and Governor Light Sean Parnell.

In an interview with the News-Miner editorial board on Friday, Parnell described a conversation he had with Young last October regarding the growing rift between the congressional delegation and the governor’s office.

As the conversation got more heated, Parnell recounted Young's words:

“He was very angry, very animated at the governor, and he basically told me, he held out his hand and said, ‘She’s like a crystalline figure in my hands and I’m going to crush her,’ and he basically said I’m going to do the same thing to you,” Parnell told the editorial board.

Before we go on let's pause and think about this for a minute.

Don Young = crochety old fart.

Sarah Palin = 44-year-old mother of five, former cheerleader, likes to snow machine, ski and also enjoys going back to work the day after she goes through labor and delivery.

I picture any matchup between Palin and Young to end quickly with Sarah squeezing Don in a thigh hold until his head explodes. Then she'd get up, grab a mop and clean up the mess herself.

*enjoys the vision for another minute*

OK, continuing on with the story...Young is now very crabby at Sean and says that Lt. Gov. Parnell got it all wrong:

Young said he compared Palin’s political career to a delicate piece of crystal.

“It’s the finest glass in the world, but when it breaks, it shatters,” Young said he told Parnell.

Young said he didn’t mean it as a threat.

Yes...because Don Young has proven many times that he regularly uses delicate imagery in his communication! And of course he never, ever threatens people...

*wipes tears of laughter from her eyes*

And then he proceeds to prove my point:

Young called Sean Parnell a “little man that’s lying” for comments the lieutenant governor made to the Fairbanks Daily News-Miner last week.

“Here’s a person running for the seat who doesn’t even have the courage to tell me he’s running, which means he’s not a man at all,” Young said.

“What’s he going to do, go over and vote?” Young asked. “You can teach a monkey to vote.”

Ahhhhh...you just can't keep a good snark down...