The candidate who wouldn't leave...

How are houseguests like fish? After seven days, both start to smell!

The same goes for presidential candidates.

Years ago, John Belushi played a hilarious houseguest from hell in the Saturday Night Live skit called "The Thing That Wouldn't Leave."

Clearly Ralph Nader missed that night or didn't get the message. He was already stinking to high heaven during his fourth presidential bid. This time, we are going to need gas masks to prevent wretching from the stench.

It's unfathomable that Nader can possibly see an actual benefit for the country by running for president a fifth time. The only explanation I can come up with is that his ego has completely blinded him in his old age.

Well, that's not the only explanation...

I got so fed up over this that I looked up Ralph Nader's email on his website The Nader Page. This is what I came up with - after edits of course.

Mr. Nader:

Stop it! Just stop!

Of what benefit could your entry into the presidential race possibly be to this country? What issue could you possibly bring to the mix that isn’t already being discussed? Poverty, corporate influence, war, government corruption, unsafe imports, NAFTA, the environment, the economy…I have heard all of those things discussed during what seem like never-ending candidate debates. The only thing your candidacy could possibly accomplish is to put John McCain squarely (and unfairly) in the White House.

Or is that what this is all about? Does your income now consist of a huge checks signed by the GOP every four years? Twelve…even eight years ago I scoffed at that accusation. Now, I’m not so sure.

Sir, your name used to strike fear and loathing in those you worked to expose like corrupt politicians and greedy corporations. Now, I’m sad to say, it has that effect on those of us who voted for you when your candidacy meant something. For the first time in decades, we have smart, articulate, qualified candidates for this country’s highest office. For the first time ever a woman or a black man may become the new leader of the free world…something long overdue.

But your ego and ambition blind you to believing no one can contribute the same way you can and in some ways that is correct. You are probably one of the few folks out there with the potential to set this country back ten years and ensure another white guy gets into office.

As a politically viable candidate, your time has long-since passed. You still have much to contribute to the world of consumer advocacy or issues near-and-dear to Green Party sympathizers. Instead, you choose to threaten this country with four or eight more years of continued disaster for the poor, for the environment, for the economy and for the soldiers serving in Iraq. After all, McCain is talking about 100 more years of war.

Mr. Nader, I’m begging you to reconsider. We have hundreds of thousands of new voters flocking to the polls…they have hope for the future at the hands of the candidates we already have. Don’t let your historical contribution be that you helped to stop an entire movement of change in this country.


Linda Kellen Biegel

My husband reminded me that hundreds of much smarter and more influential people than us have probably told him exactly the same thing. However, I sent this so I can feel just a little bit better.